With Age Comes Wisdom

Churchville residents share their appreciation for family, community

By Maggie Fitzgibbon

 

There’s a timeless saying: With age comes wisdom.

For many seniors, wisdom shines not just in giving answers, but in having the insight to know what questions to ask.

Wisdom means appreciating the value of listening, patience and humor when life doesn’t go as planned. Wisdom can also be less about one’s age, but rather about having the ability to look at life from many different perspectives.

Francis and Delores Perry, 89 and 86, respectively, are eternal optimists. These Churchville residents have simple words of wisdom to share.

Francis encourages young people to be more outgoing.

“I was a shy kid and I wish I were more friendly. When I was 8 or 9 years old, I had a crush on one of my classmates. I thought she was beautiful and every day after school, I would walk by her house hoping to see her,” he said. “One cold winter day, her father saw me outside and invited me inside to warm up and have a snack. I’ll never forget that day because that little girl became my friend.”

Francis and Delores got married when they were in their early 20s. They advise young people to take the time to travel and experience life before settling down.

“The first time I saw Delores, I was immediately infatuated and knew she was the girl for me. But I wish I had not gotten married so young because I always wanted to serve in the Coast Guard,” he said.

Delores echoed Francis’s thoughts. “Be patient with yourself. Don’t be afraid to get involved and try different things.”

Family is the foundation of the Perrys’ relationship. Growing up, both Delores and Francis lived in the same neighborhoods as their extended families.

Delores spoke of how her family and faith were and still are her guideposts. She often relied upon her elders to give advice. She advises young people to talk with an older family member to discuss any problems they may have.

“All my family lived in the same neighborhood and we took care of each other. I always knew that my family was my foundation. I could ask any family member if I needed anything,” she said. “I often would talk with a family member to discuss any problems I might have had. I think young people should talk to an older person about their problems. They might be surprised at how an older person can help them.”

Francis noted the importance of family relationships. “No one will ever love you like your mother,” Francis said.

“Your parents are your best advocates,” Delores said.

Delores and Francis’ 70-year marriage is a testament to devotion and dedication.

“Never overlook the value of human relationships. Your spouse and your family should be your top priority. Marriage should be a lifetime commitment. Respect yourself and your partner,” Francis said.

The Perrys look at life with eyes wide open, but both are idealists. They encourage young people to be hopeful.

“No matter what is wrong, not everything is permanent and things do get better,” Francis said.

“Think of what you have to change and be willing to let go,” Delores said.

 

Community Service

Marty Molinari describes himself as a “ripe teenager.” This young-at-heart Churchville resident considers his greatest life accomplishments to be his family, his faith and his community involvement.

Like the Perrys, Molinari also grew up surrounded by family, which he feels gave him the foundation for his faith and commitment to family.

“I grew up with many older cousins who helped to shape me and tell me about their life experiences, which is why my family means so much to me. I believe in mentoring young people because my cousins helped me,” he said.

His family was key in his personal development.

“My father taught me right from wrong, to always tell the truth and not to lie. He also taught me to listen to others and discern the truth. I was taught how to think, not what to think,” he said. “So often people rely upon social media or mainstream media for information. We must delve into a topic to learn the truth.”

Due to his father’s influence, education has been and remains a priority for Molinari.

He went to college and got a degree. He advises young people to take advantage of any opportunity to further their education.

“Study history and learn from it. You will learn that events that are occurring today are similar to what have happened in the past,” he said.

Molinari always made time to serve his community and as an 80-plus-year-old, he continues to do so. He is a member of the Churchville Lions Club and sings in the choir at his church. When his children were young, he coached their soccer teams. After his children aged out of the league, the soccer organization leaders requested that he return to coaching.

“It’s important that we invest in our community, especially our young people,” he said.

He is the founder of a student group called the Leo Club. The group is made up of Churchville-Chili Central School District students in grades 7-12. The premise of the group is to participate in Lions Club community service projects as well as fundraising activities to benefit families and neighbors in need.

“We are now in our 28th year. I’ve kept in touch with some of the students who were members of our first Leo Club. One is a doctor, another a policeman and another a firefighter. We work with the kids to teach them the importance of community service, giving back to their community and most importantly, on how to be a good citizen,” he said.

Delores, Francis and Marty have lived through decades of change; their life experiences can offer guidance rooted in real-life lessons.

By celebrating our elders and their rich histories, we can learn valuable lessons. With age comes wisdom and with wisdom, a legacy worth passing on.